You make me feel worthless,
and you don't even know
The darkness that looms over my shoulder -
you don't even know
I'm tying -
but my lungs don't fill with air
like yours do
like theirs do
The silence is my friend-
because you don't listen anyhow
I'm not afraid of it,
unlike all of you
The short end of the fire -
the darkness that I feed off of
When I try to communicate,
it doesn't click
It won't matter anymore -
I'm only crying empty tears
because
that's what they are to you
My body becomes a fractured dam,
water gathers with the first taste
of freedom, no longer content
to be oppressed.
It rages, and rages and rages
while I feel myself on the verge
of bursting apart at the seams.
How can I sit still?
Move through the world
with calm precession?
Scarcely able to breathe
not daring to part my lips to speak
for fear I will only scream and howl
with madness.
It rages, and rages and rages,
there are earthquakes within my brain,
a tornado carried inside,
hurricanes under my skin.
I feel every cell vibrating,
threatening to erupt with singular need,
only your touch can cold me together
with enough pressur
, but he killed me.
_
i. first light- i met you in a crimson forest.
it was a rose garden summer, and out of a black mercedes
you walked out, your five year old eyes greener than
sunlit saplings
you reached up to pluck a rose from its stem, and offered it to me.
"what's your name?"
daddy told me that i couldn't tell strangers my real name.
I looked at the rose in my hand.
"Rose."
you smiled, you were a seastorm of now long-gone innocence.
i didn't understand
but I knew.
ii. i forgot about you for
1562 days, 11 hours, and 22 minutes,
you shouted
my name, but i didn't recognize you
until i saw your
Such a violent silence
Such an unnerving suspense
A soon as I read it
I was astonished
At the date of submission I immediately looked
I did not want to believe it
Submitted 4 hours ago
I start to panic
Everything around me sinks faster than the Titanic
Please tell me you didn't go...
Of the lack of response I don't care
For someone like you's so rare
And even if you don't trust you
I won't give up on you
Through the deadliest void
I'll find a way and offer you a hand
The violence that may surround you I'd withstand
As I can't stand seeing you destroyed
Finally a comment submerged
The danger was overcomed
Pushed behind a thin emotional ha
and do
you forget
that we
are not
the same?
we will never be.
not matter how hard i try to make the pieces fit.
you ruin me.
i paid the price as i rolled the dice
i handed out a ticket to my virgin heart.
i thought i knew better.
i thought we had them fooled.
what did i know?
what did we know?
tell me,
do i
deserve this?
i lose count of the reasons to live
and drown and drown in reasons to cry.
our minds are separate.
i do not know the man i look at; its a shame.
our hearts are separate.
and still, i hoped that you'd feel the pain.
i feel the ripple of disruption
when you jump through the puddles
i feel the quake of the earth as
y
Have you ever heard a song
singing the mysteries of me
when you drink from my words,
as cries of love, and of pain
float into verse and stanza;
a moonlit voice showing the way.
Delicate and tubular,
or as waves crashing
to drown you in darkness.
The breath of spirit trembles
to the melody of my soul.
I wish you could hear the music.
Thinking of you I am driven out of my mind,
grasping at the sheets for what sanity I can find,
if you hear me call, will come to me tonight?
Help me leave all this madness behind.
I fear that I am losing this fight,
all I want to do is grab on and hold you tight,
fallen on my knees will you listen to my pray,
because I cannot breathe another moment out of your sight.
In this temple we made for ourselves I want to stay,
hold my hand at least until the break of day,
don't just leave me standing here alone,
it is only your words that show me the way.
In our private moments I can atone
truth is only found in flesh and bone,
waiting for
I care not for war,
Nor battles won
And idealised.
I have fought enough to know
That muddied fields
Show blood too.
And I have probably fought and killed
As many allies
As enemies,
They all look the same
In the reflection of dull metals.
My ears hurt.
I am tired of the noise.
So fight this revolution
Without me.
Take my banner
And fly it high.
A few more stains won't matter.
And when you return,
Traumatised from your victory,
I will wash your face
And whisper a thank you
You won't have deserved.
And should you not return
I shall gather your pieces,
As many as I can find,
And give you a burial
Worthy of the sacrifice
That you never should